Beauty from Ashes, gotcha baby girl.

We woke up really early Monday Morning, maybe 4 am and that was it. There was no way we were going back to sleep. The excitement of getting our girl combined with jet lag was just too much. 

We were ready early and had breakfast done and over with. 

We had to kill many many hours! Many many hours until we could meet her at 2:00 pm. After breakfast, We hung out in the beautiful Garden the hotel has. 

It really is a cool thing. 

Then we walked around the garden doing some window shopping. 

I'm having a hard time remembering what all we did because it just seemed so obsolete for what happened later that day. 

We walked with our guide Judy to Aeon's. It's a two level grocery store.  We  got diapers, baby milk and snacks, and other supplies. 

The driver picked us up there and we were on our way to go get our girl! 

Can I tell you? That drive was so stinking long! Traffic was bad and gosh it just seemed like for-ev-er! 

It's such a surreal feeling - knowing your meeting you child that day. Just like I had worried with Chu, I worried I wouldn't feel enough when we finally met her. 

We Finally got there and they took us up an elevator. 

We were late and the room was full of families. The feelings in that room are like walking into a brick wall. So overwhelming. There were already families with babies that were crying. It's so breathtaking beautiful to watch an orphan become a beloved son or daughter. At the same time, it's heartbreaking to see how really scared each child is. The adoption community has a saying "beauty from ashes" 

Isn't that the truth. There's so much loss for her. First she lost lost her birth mom (I promise you her soal was very aware of that loss even at a minutes old) and now she's experience loss again. 

Just minutes after we were there we saw a beautiful reunion. It was a little girl that had been hosted in the states. Her host family had adopted her. That "gotcha" was all happy tears and I lost it right then! 

We watched a few more families unite with tiny ones and still know baby girl. 

The girls waiting for their sister. 

Then suddenly, she past through the room. 

It was so fast we didn't get a picture. 

Again it seemed like forever before they brought her back out. 

When they finally did she was already upset and crying. She did look right at us as we walked towards her. 

I'm sure we looked familiar but super scary. 

She was handed to Shane first. She screamed poor girl and poor Shane.  She probably had only seen one other man her whole life. 

This picture breaks my heart. Can you imagine? Your whole world changing in an instant. All that you have is the clothes that your wearing? 

Poor sweet angel. 

It wasn't long until I took her and then she quieted down but didn't stop fussing. She wouldn't look at me. Anywhere but at me. It was hours before she made eye contact. 

She was hot and sweaty. She had a bad heat rash on most of her body. The skin around her neck was open and oozing. 

We asked our guide if we were done and could go. We needed out of the hot room with crying babies. 

 

She fussed all the way back. She throws herself back when she's mad and she is quite strong. I worry I'll drop her when she does that. 

We went up to our room. She wanted me to hold her but didn't want me too. She would cry if I put her down and she'd reach back up for me. Then cry if I held her.  At one point she decided I could hold her but only if she held my face, specifically my nose, right where she wanted it. 😂

 

She wanted and still wants to stand, the thing is, she has no balance. She's very wobbly. She can't even stand holding one handed. We have to hold  both her arms and honestly we just can't always do that so it makes her mad.  

I'm sure that she went straight from the crib to a walker every day and that's why she wants to be straight. 

She can sit and roll but she cannot crawl.  We will be working on that. Crawling is so important. 

I finally stripped her sweaty dress off and bathed her. She hated it. 

But after I rubbed coconut oil on all her sores and dressed her she started to settle a bit. 

She had that sucker for hours just like Chu had his. 

That's when we found a few curls. We will see how curly it really is as it grows. 

But this hair wants to curl backwards. Lol 

We've heard Asian cupey doll and Asian Gerber baby a few times because of that curl. 

Later, I layed beside her as she went to sleep and that's how we closed the day. 

Precious girl, I promise to try my hardest to make up for so much loss. Together we will find the beauty. 

We love you.